August 07, 2009
Excuse me, dahrlings, but...

Don't Worry, Be Happy

Oh my god! I had no idea! That strange queasy feeling I’ve been nursing for the last 35 years – apparently it isn’t indigestion. According to the University of Chicago, it’s happiness. That’s right Pumpkins. And you have it too.…

August 05, 2009
Excuse me, dahrlings, but...

Someone's Finally Putting Sex Back Into Travel

Seems Porter is expanding beyond their little propeller offerings. This morning’s Post says: “the Toronto Island upstart is moving closer to an initial pubic offering as it ponders another aircraft purchase.†[quoted verbatim at 9:16am, 5AUG] Throughout history,…

July 31, 2009
Excuse me, dahrlings, but...

Go Tweet Yourself

A dapper young man at a recent function leaned in close and said “Do you tweet?†Well. I excitedly flipped through my mental Mae West riposte library, preparing for some hot repartee, when it struck me he was talking about…

July 29, 2009
Excuse me, dahrlings, but...

Livin' La VIA Loca

A dear Pumpkin has written in with a rather acute observation on VIA’s recent big ideas. (I looked up possible rhymes for VIA and got gonorrhea. Wait, I didn’t get gonorrhea. Holy Maria. The search results I got came up…

July 24, 2009
Excuse me, dahrlings, but...

Should Babies Really Be Allowed To Fly?

Let’s face it, Pumpkins, those little creatures can’t lower their own tray, they smell and they’re lousy conversationalists. Mostly, they scream and whine and carry on. I’ve been banned from entire airlines for less. Exactly why babies get away with…

July 21, 2009
Excuse me, dahrlings, but...

To The Moon Alice!

Don’t you just love all the lunar landing hoopla? It’s so…moony. And isn’t that Buzz just the silver fox? I could get busy with a man called Buzz – we’re talking serious G-force. Ya baby. Fire up the thrusters. …

July 20, 2009
Excuse me, dahrlings, but...

Where Is The Other Shoe?

It’s so good to read all the passion in your little voices, dahrlings. I truly feel it – deep in my essential self. Now my loins are girded for the next step: action. I hate to say it, Pumpkins, but…

July 10, 2009
Excuse me, dahrlings, but...

Have Pinkies, Will Travel

Sometimes the universe provides a conflagration of events which defy description – yet demand our attention. Two news stories crossed through my inbox at exactly the same time-place axis. One is of historical road trip significance – the passing of…

July 07, 2009
Excuse me, dahrlings, but...

This Time We Have To Beat It

You Have To Show United That You’re Really Not ScaredThey’re Playin’ With Your Life, This Ain’t No Truth Or DareThey’ll Kick You, Then They Beat You, Then They’ll Tell You It’s FairSo Beat It, Just Beat It Michael Jackson, with…

June 30, 2009
Excuse me, dahrlings, but...

We Want The Moose Back

I never thought I’d miss a moose. But the Mounties? Well pumpkins, that’s another story. When the Canadian Tourism Commission decided there was more to Canada than massive outcroppings, committee-designed swamp critters and dashing young men in red serge, this…