Excuse me, dahrlings, but...

Bah Humbug!
Ivanna Gabbalot

There’s a brilliant trend out and about on the interweb this
Christmas, Pumpkins. I’m receiving darling
little holiday emails that go something like this: “A Warm Christmas Greeting
To You & Yours. But, seriously, our product is fabulous, book something.”

Really? Can you not hold back your urge for self-flattery
long enough to at least simulate earnestness? I married someone like that once. His pressing urge to blandish himself was
perpetually overtaking his chinos.

And speaking of spankings, the
Liberals have outlawed them, dahrlings. Fifty Shades aficionados must be
apoplectic. Trudeau senior had wisely said the state has no place in the
bedrooms of consenting adults (though many had made room for his state) – now
here is junior messing with the buckles that bind liberal thinking. Poor
Sophie.

I’ll try not to let these
disappointments dampen my Christmas spirit, Pumpkins. After all, so many of you
are out there like merry elves cobbling travel miracles for your clients.
Baking a vacation fruitcake, of sorts. Perhaps not on the scale of WestJet and
Air Canada’s holiday giving, but when someone finally lands on that beach, sips
that first margarita and climbs into a fresh resort bed for wild suntan lotion
scented abandon, who do they think of?

Merry Christmas Everyone!! Yes, and please do take this moment to review all my previous fabulous work. It's all wonderfully entertaining and amusing. As am I. You can order signed copies of my portrait below. 

Ivanna Gabbalot

Columnist

Part legend, part myth, all woman: Ivanna Gabbalot is OJ’s gossip columnist and considers herself the industry’s conscience. Equally annoying to Open Jaw management and inflated egos in C-suites everywhere, Ivanna works infrequently, preferring to snipe from the sidelines.

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