Don’t you hate it when planes look like they’re on fire at the top of the news? Honestly, Pumpkins, we have to learn to control the media. There’s clearly a concerted conspiracy spreading travel paranoia throughout the land.
Let’s recap the images in the news of late, shall we Pumpkins? A large cruise ship lying on its side; a derailed passenger train and a plane which isn’t on fire. Pictures repeatedly burned into the crania of our clients. All that’s missing is a group of tourists being held at gunpoint! Oh ya, never mind.
It’s all very bad for business, Pumpkins, and I think pressure should be exerted on such irresponsible journalism. (You should hear the screeching around here if I goad an advertiser. My job was so much more fun when we didn’t have any.)
The dinkettes could run around screeching at The Globe, but it might be more effective if we took matters into our own hands, dahrlings. Harper owns a robo-phone-caller which dials hundreds of people and, posing as Elections Canada, spreads counter-propaganda faster than you can say “non-confidence”. If we ask nicely, I’m sure he’ll lend us his cool robot. I’ve prepared a text: “Hello, this is the Association of Canadian Travel Agencies. There never was a burning plane. You should travel. Buy Dukoral.”
This just in.... After a fire in the engine room, the Costa Allegra is adrift in the Indian Ocean.
I give up.
