Terrorists are taking a new tack in the war against freedom, Pumpkins. In Bangkok yesterday, an Iranian bomber blew his own legs off. The grenade he threw at police ricocheted off a tree and landed at his feet. The cunning tactic dumbfounded authorities.
Apparently Al Qaida operatives are studying the technique and global travel warnings are being issued. Since airport personnel are not trained in this strange new menace, passengers are advised to be on the lookout for suspicious looking characters stabbing themselves, shooting themselves or attempting to bomb themselves.
