Excuse me, dahrlings, but...

Going Where No Airline Has Gone Before

Porter is taking their traffic marbles and going home, Pumpkins. They tried to play fair -- sharing monthly loads and such with the media, even though, as privates, they didn't have to. All was going swimmingly until their numbers dipped. Guess what? The practice of releasing loads has ended. If you want to know why, they are a private company, so none of your bee's wax.

I know. It's a real mystery.

But, can you blame them, dahrlings? If my roots are showing, (horrors!), believe you me, I put on pants.

And about those growth plans -- I always say, Pumpkins, if you don't have length, pray for loft. Since Porter’s stubby runways aren’t long enough to satisfy a C-series [what’s the C stand for anyway?], there are other options besides an extension. There’s up, Bob. Always up.

Travel to Mars is all the rage, dahrlings. A Dutch businessman is planning a spaceship and 80,000 people have responded to a call for Martian settlers. Think of the load factors! Bombardier just has to channel that whisper technology vertically into the stratosphere instead of horizontally into the lake. God knows we all have to be flexible.

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