Excuse me, dahrlings, but...

Another Keel Is Laid

How many more keel laying ceremonies are we to be subjected to, Pumpkins? There was a time when that was news. A rare occasion to be celebrated.

Like when one of the dinkettes here got laid (Talk about a Quantum leap. Don’t think about that too long. You won’t recover.) Cruise lines are laying in shipyards more often than I do. And finding new ports of call to colonize.

There are currently 38 new ships on order for a total of 4.2 gross tons. In 2015, cruise lines will add 19,000 passenger capacity. Soon, we’ll be facing traffic jams along the med.

The mandate is “Everyone will be cruise assimilated. Resistance is futile.” And the irresistible offer to make that happen is “packaging”, dahrlings. A last ditch attempt to seal the deal by tossing in your sister.

I know what it’s like to be desperate, Pumpkins, I do. But stop sending out press releases every time you get laid. Have some dignity. Honestly.

Ivanna Gabbalot

Columnist

Part legend, part myth, all woman: Ivanna Gabbalot is OJ’s gossip columnist and considers herself the industry’s conscience. Equally annoying to Open Jaw management and inflated egos in C-suites everywhere, Ivanna works infrequently, preferring to snipe from the sidelines.

You may also like
pilots stand in solidarity at person airport
Ratcheting Up: Hundreds of Air Canada Pilots Picket
Air Canada pilots took part in major picketing action across the country on 27AUG as they attempt to pressure the airline ...
Globus Family of Brands Expands Canadian Sales Team
The Globus family of brands is strengthening its Canadian sales team by appointing BDMs Gina Goranson in the west and Elaine ...
Direct Travel Advisor Sue Pechtel Celebrates 50 Years in Travel
Last week in Edmonton, Direct Travel advisor Sue Pechtel celebrated her 50th anniversary in the travel industry with around 90 friends, ...
Industry Partners Support ACTA Summit with Prizing and Sponsorships
ACTA has announced the grand prizes for the 2024 ACTA Summits, which include Air Canada, Riverside Luxury Cruises, CroisiEurope Cruises, and ...
Cruise Boom Driven by Need for Ease, Despite the Price
While segments of the travel industry are talking about a slowdown, cruise lines have increased prices and still see record numbers, ...

Talk Back! Post a comment: