Excuse me, dahrlings, but...

What Is The Value Of A Willy?

Today’s business cartoon series, Dilbert, depicts the secretary with a pair of scissors aiming to separate a higher salaried male from his man parts. He explains that his penis simply gives him the right to earn more.

In Keynesian economics, the inference is that larger, weightier and better performing peckers should earn more than less in demand weewees. Should we take a pole of our predominantly male leaders, Pumpkins?

Sunday is International Women’s Day, dahrlings, and one can’t help but give pause. Have we progressed beyond arm ornaments and baby makers? Well of course we have, dahrlings. The Open Jaw dinkettes' decorative value would have left them starved 100 years ago.

Unfortunately, the sad truth is women around the world still have a very long way to go, babies. Of the 25,000 reported yearly rape cases in India, 98% are committed by a friend or relative. One of the gang members of the Delhi bus rapists says he doesn’t regret anything. In war zones, girls as young as 9 are being sold into sexual slavery. In the Democratic Republic of Congo, 400,000 women were violated between 2006 and 2007.

The sane men on this side of the globe need to do more.

 

Ivanna Gabbalot

Columnist

Part legend, part myth, all woman: Ivanna Gabbalot is OJ’s gossip columnist and considers herself the industry’s conscience. Equally annoying to Open Jaw management and inflated egos in C-suites everywhere, Ivanna works infrequently, preferring to snipe from the sidelines.

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