Excuse me, dahrlings, but...

It’s Unfathomable
Ivanna Gabbalot

We in travel will leave no stone unturned if there's money
hidden in the grime, dahrlings. The last frontier – altruism – is primed and
pumped for dispensing cash.

The new fathom cruise ship is being touted as a 'social impact journey'.
Oh-puhlease. When a multi-national like Carnival Corp., with almost 4 billion
in earnings last quarter, turns their sites on selling human generosity – you
know you're looking at a shareholder impact journey.

Now, if you're wondering if there's something oxymoronic about profit and
altruism – don't give it another thought, dahrlings. Carnival Corp. will package
it in such a way your clients will be asking for fries with their do-gooding.

Goodness knows, I have nothing against making money,
Pumpkins. But I'm not sure I want to sail with a boatload of people who
consider themselves above regular cruising while they discuss the cacao planting ladies they met that afternoon over a nicely
chilled glass of Chablis. I
might choke on the back-patting.

The point is, saving the world is all well and good,
dahrlings, but the anti-hedonism movement is starting to cramp my narcissistic travel style. It may be hard to fathom, but I like my champagne guilt-free.

Ivanna Gabbalot

Columnist

Part legend, part myth, all woman: Ivanna Gabbalot is OJ’s gossip columnist and considers herself the industry’s conscience. Equally annoying to Open Jaw management and inflated egos in C-suites everywhere, Ivanna works infrequently, preferring to snipe from the sidelines.

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