Excuse me, dahrlings, but...

Insert The Metal Fitting Is Not Just A Suggestion
Ivanna Gabbalot

As everyone knows, dahrlings, I’m not big on authority
(unless the authority figure is big on me). But when flying through the air in a
pressurized metal tube, I tend to pay attention. And not just because pilots
are terminally cute.

Yesterday, on AC088 to Toronto from Shanghai the announcement from the cockpit called
for seat belts.
And then the plane hit turbulence. Not just the shake-up-your-martini kind. The sudden jolt sent
children and baggage smashing into the overhead bins. Passengers were hurt.

Well, no shit Sherlock. “Insert the metal fitting into the
buckle and tighten the straps” sound
familiar? The flight attendant is not quoting from Fifty Shades,
parents. It stops your kid’s head
from hitting the ceiling.

And then there’s the dink who bit
an AC flight attendant on the way to Delhi yesterday. Fort
McMurray resident Jaskaran Sidhu is being charged.

Was there some kind of year end in-flight common-sense deprivation? There's been more airborne fruitcakes this year than booty on a Kardashian. Thank heavens it's over. 

It is over, isn't it? Can I pop my cork now? Happy New Year everyone!!

Ivanna Gabbalot

Columnist

Part legend, part myth, all woman: Ivanna Gabbalot is OJ’s gossip columnist and considers herself the industry’s conscience. Equally annoying to Open Jaw management and inflated egos in C-suites everywhere, Ivanna works infrequently, preferring to snipe from the sidelines.

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