Excuse me, dahrlings, but...

It's Pumpkin Day!
Ivanna Gabbalot

Dear pumpkins, I feel humbled on this day of days. May 4th is Travel Agent Day and as Trump says 'we will celebrate bigly.' 

Telling someone where to go in exchange for money is one of the oldest and most honoured professions. 

Mary Magdalene told the Romans where to shove it and in turn was showered with water turned to wine and nice fish.

I've been pointing people in the right direction for years. Just yesterday I told a driver they were going the wrong way and got a finger for my troubles. 

As we all know, it can be a tough job. Underpaid. Under appreciated. But, dahrlings, when we see the faces of the little people we send on the trip of their dreams. The fulfillment of their little savings account. Sending them off on an adventure you have no control over. You feel, to the core of your being, terrified. 

And that's what makes it all worthwhile, Pumpkins. Life is a magic carpet ride. And we, dahrlings, have the great honour of participating in someone's journey of discovery. 

Ivanna Gabbalot

Columnist

Part legend, part myth, all woman: Ivanna Gabbalot is OJ’s gossip columnist and considers herself the industry’s conscience. Equally annoying to Open Jaw management and inflated egos in C-suites everywhere, Ivanna works infrequently, preferring to snipe from the sidelines.

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