Excuse me, dahrlings, but...

And Now For Something Completely Different

In the “Don’t They Know Who We Are?” Corner

ASTA is on the Cuban case, Pumpkins. Their board voted unanimously to: “re-engage through staff in active support of lifting the current ban on U.S. citizen travel to Cuba.” Primo, is that even a sentence? I have re-engaged a staff. And I have always provided extremely active support. But I’m unclear on the “re-engaging through staff” concept. Secondly, I’m not sure the U.S. administration gives a rat’s patootie that ASTA wants Americans to travel to Cuba. Re-engaged staff or otherwise. But it’s a very nice sentiment and you can count on my vote. And my staff’s.

Showers Are So 2009

Then there’s the case of the dry shampoo which turns an everyday vacation into a travel extravaganza. It is marketed as “the new way to get the most out of travelling in 2010!” and the “must have” for anyone planning to travel. Apparently when your hair is really grungy and “has developed a foul odour” from running about Disney all day with the kids, or ziplining, or rolling around in zebra dung – the Salon Grafix new Invisible Dry Spray Shampoo is just the thing. Who has time for showers? You simply spray the “new invisible formula” onto your greasy stinky hair, brush it and voila! You are refreshed and ready for cocktails.

Beam Me Up Scottie

Reminds me of the PAN (Personal Area Network) Travel Vest – this stuff is good for hours of fun. The vest is a patented Technology Enabled Clothing-TEC® item which none of us should travel without. It is similar to a hunting vest, but instead of loading it up with bullets and such, you plug all your electronic gadgets and wires into the pockets and hidden holders and – voila – your cell phone and ipad and palm pilot are all tucked away “fashionably and effortlessly”. Although it’s probably not wise to travel without PAN-enabled clothing, I think I’ll pass. Now, if they come up with a battery operated pair of panties, I’m in.


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