This just in... On direct orders from the Government of the United States of America... pizza is declared to be a vegetable. This is not a test, Pumpkins.
From now on, when Mrs. Jones reaches for a frozen pie at the supermarket she will see a broccoli or a parsnip before her eyes. No word on whether vegetables are, therefore, a pizza.
Pizza parlours all over the U.S.A. are changing signs and menus to offer thick or thin vegetables. A dispute over the 1-800-VEGETABLE number is raging between Vegetable-Vegetable and Vegie Hut.
If the move is successful, the American government plans to undertake other re-education programs such as ‘Being sick is good for you!’ and ‘War is fun for the whole family!’
I am attempting a similar technique where I ask clients to look at a large spinning wheel and repeat, ‘I like paying travel taxes’ before telling them the fare. I have not had much success, yet – but plan on experimenting with various Kool-aid additives next. God bless America.
